The Speech Impediment

Franklin had a speech impediment - a sort of bark which he could not control. He had newly arrived at the village school one morning, sat himself down amongst the other pupils, then promptly barked his presence to the welcoming laughter around him. The other children thought it both funny and at the same time a puzzle. They tried to hold Franklin's jaws together with tightly pressed hands, but could succeed in only muffling what was still a noticeable bark. Several years passed and many people came to the village to hear the strange impediment. Some stayed overnight in the pair of hostelries and for a few, Franklin became a sort of pilgrimage for luck.

Then one day he lost the bark. It had simply stopped coming. Franklin shook himself and swallowed for days on end, and banged the side of his head against tree-trunks - but it had gone forever. And so, he imitated his bark. Walking around the village in twists and circles he would emit his false notes at regular intervals just like before; but people knew right away what had happened. They were too polite to bring the subject up with him, and so his barking continued. The visits and pilgrimages dried up very soon though. And furthermore, Franklin obviously knew that they knew; but he was too lost and foolish to stop the charade. It ended up being most unfortunate for everybody that Franklin lived to be ninety-seven years of age.